YOUTH VOICES
Taking Up Space And Owning Your Crown
BY Mpho Lucho Sibanyoni | Activist, poet, tutor for Life Sciences and English, Mamelodi, Pretoria
FROMER MISS South Africa, Zozibini Tunzi, after her crowning as Miss Universe in 2019, said “Leadership needs to be taught to young girls at an early stage in their lives for them to occupy spaces that will make them realize their full potential. It’s something that has been lacking in young girls and women for a very long time—not because they don’t want to, but because of what society has labelled women to be. I think we are the most powerful beings in the world, and that we should be given every opportunity equal to what men are getting—and that is what we should be teaching these young girls—to take up space.”
This is what women should be doing: taking up space and flourishing in all aspects of life. This, however, is not the case. Women are under siege from gender-based violence and inequality, human trafficking and more. This is a critical time for girls in the world. It is a time for the protection and assertion of rights; a time to listen hard and speak louder, no matter how difficult. It’s time to call out the continuing imbalances of power; to band together and take a stand on the changes that must happen so that girls and women are heard and their experiences are taken seriously. It is a time to act together with men and boys, on the issues that will determine a lived equality for all, central to which is the ending of violence against women and girls.
The stereotype persists that men are more capable leaders than women, alienating women and preventing them from having the same opportunities presented to men. Our Gogo (Grandmother) Dr Esther Mahlangu, the renowned Ndebele artist, proved that her age and womanhood does not define her. She always embraced her roots and, through the arts, fashion and design, showcased her heritage, dominance, creativity, social power, and achievements. This exemplified self-love and self-validation as the core values of reaching one’s full potential. She passed this baton to the young generation of women, to continue being dedicated to intergenerational leadership and to co-creating the future.
It is through the leadership of such icons, that a radical shift has happened in South Africa, with women now bringing bold fashion heritage to workplaces. Today more women are choosing to swap conventional work attire for colour and culture—a boost to one’s self-image. Whether it’s a Xhosa regal head wrap, or a blazer trimmed with African print fabric, or the inclusion of Zulu beadwork bracelets and neckpieces as accessories, clothing items that honour one’s African roots gives one strength and confidence. This is something that a conventional power suit often can’t achieve. There is a unique power in wearing items that draw on a proud African history. They celebrate the lineage of queens and matriarchs who carved the pathways to the boardrooms in which African women increasingly sit. Women are now realizing their own power: and it’s beautiful to behold.
Yet, we still have a long way to go: systemic violence, online bullying, discrimination and many other issues continue to affect women. One of these, self-love, as advocated by Dr Mahlangu, is a crucial element in developing the inner image of the girl-child.
With all the appetite you’ve had for love, you didn’t deserve to have your heart broken and constantly starved for honesty, time and attention. You deserve a love that feels like home; a love that feels like a safe haven even from the wars that happen within your own heart. Protection isn’t just a physical act. It is also the peaceful space we deliberately create for our loved ones to feel secure. A love that brings solitude and peace when you feel restless from your daily struggles.
May your heart no longer find itself at a table where it is forced to feed others and do the dishes while it is left to starve. Every time you accept excuses, what you’re actually saying is that you don’t truly believe that you’re worthy of real love. May you experience love that is intentional about pursuing your heart.